Emotional numbness is where we experience mild to
severe feelings of detachment – so it’s hard for us to access normal feelings
any more. This includes both negative and positive emotions as you can’t decide
to shut just one feeling off. Common causes of emotional numbness include
different stresses or traumas … from receiving bad news … to being in an
accident … to recovering from the death of someone close … to a relationship
breakup … to feeling deeply humiliated or ashamed.
So how do you overcome emotional numbness and live
with emotional integrity again?
1. The first thing to do is to choose to respect
and allow all emotions – no matter what they
are. Also, try and grasp the fact that suppressing your emotions will likely
lead to heartache and problems later on (as they’ll possibly resurface at
inappropriate times.)
2. Try and understand that feelings and actions are
two very different, and unrelated, things. That is, you can still feel angry without becoming violent –
so don’t assume your feelings will affect your actions, too.
3. Try to figure out the message behind intense
emotions. Are you angry because you’ve been hurt, used or abused? Are you sad
because deep down you feel that you’ll never find true love - as you can’t
believe that anyone will love you for yourself?
4. Take that risk – and find the courage to ask
someone for help. If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll know that there are
those who genuinely love you like – like a true and caring friend. The
important thing is not to try and isolate yourself, and to make the extra
effort to prioritise self-care. You need other people to help you work through
this.
5. Seek professional help if the symptoms persist.
There are excellent counsellors and therapists out there who have the training
and skills to help you to get free – so you can live a more fulfilling and
normal, healthy life.
6. Be patient within yourself. It’s likely to take
time – as you will need to learn to trust, and take some barriers down, so you
can be yourself again (and that is often hard to do when you’ve experience hurt
and pain).
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