10 Ways to Tell If You Can Trust Your
Boyfriend/Girlfriend
Do you have a sneaking suspicion that your partner isn’t
as trustworthy as they’d like you to believe? Before you trust them with your
heart, ask yourself these 10 questions:
A1. Do
they have a history of lying? If you’ve known them for a
while you might know if they have been involved in any lying scandals or if
their last previous relationships have ended because of lying or cheating. If
so, you need to wonder why they would treat your relationship any differently.
A2. Do
they think it’s ok when others lie? If they think it’s no big
deal for their friends to lie to their boyfriends or girlfriends or if it’s
excusable for their parents to be dishonest, then chances are they think it’s
acceptable behavior for themselves too.
A3. Are
they a closed or open book? Do you know many personal details
about them or do they keep their lives under lock and key? If you’re always the
one spilling your guts while they stay tight-lipped you might wonder why
they’re so reluctant to share. Are they just shy, or are they hiding something?
A4. Can
you rely on them? Do they follow through on what they say
they’re going to do? If they’re constantly breaking promises, standing you up
and leaving you high and dry you might want to look at why you want to be with
someone who you can’t count on.
A5. Do
they lie to others? If they are constantly bending the truth
with their friends or sneaking around behind their parent’s backs you should
wonder what they’re being dishonest about with you.
A6. Are
their stories inconsistent? Do they change the details of stories
depending on whom they’re talking to? Do they often manipulate what they’re
saying to influence the outcome? If they can’t keep details of their stories
straight you have to wonder if they’re just forgetful or if they’re trying to
cover something up.
A7. Do
they make you feel comfortable and safe? Or do you feel like you’re
always on guard or waiting to catch them in a lie? If so, that doesn’t sound
like a very fun relationship to be in.
A8. Do
they reveal your secrets? Have you ever confided in them only to
find out later that their friends know all the details? Even if they spill a
minor secret, you should worry. If you can’t trust them to keep your personal
details to themselves then how are you ever going to be comfortable enough to
trust them with your feelings?
A9. Do
they only care about themselves? If they are always looking
out only for themselves then chances are they won’t hesitate to throw you under
the bus or sell you out to get what they want.
A10.
What does your gut tell you? You might not have clear-cut
answers to all of these questions, but you should be clear on what your
instincts are telling you. If your intuition tells you that you can’t fully trust
them then don’t ignore those feelings!
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