Many of us grew up in homes where feeling was a bad word.
Tears were childish, anger was bad, and vulnerability was not to be shown. But
more and more, our culture is beginning to understand there's value in paying
attention to our feelings. Emotions used to be considered nuisances — signs of
weakness associated with hormones and irrationality.
Here are 16 signs you have an impressive EQ (Emotional
Quotient).
1. You
know the difference between a thought and a feeling.
You know thoughts form as phrases or sentences in your mind
(e.g. I'm not good enough) and feelings form as sensations in your body (such
as heartbreak, infuriation, anxiety). And you know both thoughts and feelings
come and go —you don't have to do anything with them but acknowledge them with
mindfulness and compassion.
2. You
have a strong emotional vocabulary.
You know there's more than one description of your
experience of "sad," for example. Perhaps you're disappointed. Or
you're despairing. Or you're grieving. You know when you're feeling irritable
or low, and you know when you're feeling empty.
3.
You're not afraid of your own feelings, even difficult ones.
You make space for them rather than avoid or numb them.
4.
You're not afraid of others' feelings, even difficult ones.
You create a safe space for them to be expressed rather than
changing the subject or finding an excuse to get the eff outta there.
5.
You're non-reactive.
Although you're aware that you're feeling something, you
react intentionally rather than instinctively (e.g. You don't swear or smash
stuff on the regular).
6. You
have empathy for others.
You can imagine and understand the feelings they might be
experiencing.
7.
You're in touch with the bodily sensations you experience in response to
emotion.
You recognize feelings like guilt, anxiety, heartbreak, and
grief in your body.
8. You
can tell easily when partner, friend, or family member is upset without them
telling you.
You can read them.
9. You
adjust your behaviour based on who you're with.
You've been called a social chameleon, or told you get along
with everyone. You know what's socially desirable and what's not given your
environment.
10. You
thrive in a leadership role.
You have no problem spearheading projects or captaining
teams.
11. You
ask people questions about them.
You're genuinely interested in their lives and stories.
12. You
know your values.
Underneath it all, you're in touch with what drives you.
13. You
know the importance of listening to your heart.
You don't always go for the "logical" choice,
whether it's when you're choosing a pair of shoes or choosing a partner.
14. You
know how to work a room.
You thrive as a wedding or Christmas party date, even when
you know no one.
15.
You're able to deal with conflict.
You don't avoid it and you don't become aggressive in
response to it.
16.
You're not derailed from a goal by a single (or several) setback(s).
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