Do relationships affect our goals?
How
Relationships Affect Your Goals?
Everything in our lives can change when we are in a
relationship, including our goals. What we want for ourselves and how we work
towards achieving it is largely affected by our relationship and our partner.
Here are some of the ways that our relationships affect our goals:
1. Take
on their level of motivation. When we are in a relationship
we often take on a lot of the same likes and dislikes as our partner,
especially as we spend more and more time together. This includes levels of
motivation. If our partner is highly motivated, it can rub off on us and push
us to set goals beyond what we might normally do. On the flip side, if our
partner is unmotivated it can bring us down and make us lazy and complacent.
2. Changes
travel-based goals. Many of our goals have to do with travel, or
moving to a new city for school, work or adventure. When we get into a couple
these goals may shift priority for us. We might not be as interested in
pursuing goals that would have us leave where our partner is, and we might put
these goals on the backburner in order to stay close to each other.
3. Sense
of competition. We can become motivated to set and achieve
goals if we have a competitive streak, and want to outdo, or keep up with our
partner. If they are getting awarded a bunch of scholarships it might push us
to apply for some and study extra hard ourselves, so as not to be outdone by
them. Our competitive nature can be a great driving force behind our
motivation.
4. Set
goals as a couple. When you’re single, all of your goals are
probably centered around yourself. When you are part of a couple, you will
likely start to set goals and make future plans as a couple. Maybe you’d like
to see yourselves moving in together as part of your 5-year plan, or you start
saving money together to take a trip together.
5. Blurred
lines between whose goals are whose. The more time you spend
together as a couple, the more common it is to start rubbing off on each other.
You might take on some of their likes and dislikes, as well as some of their
personality traits. We often have goals in mind that confuse what we want with
what they might want. It’s common to have goals set that aren’t really
something that you want or that you’d be working towards if you weren’t with
your partner.
6. Affects
types of goals. As a single person, your goals might be more
socially focused and you might be interested in working towards things that
will get your out and meeting new people. When you’re in a couple, your
priorities can shift. You might become more interested in setting goals
together or goals that are relationship based.
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