Do relationships affect our goals?

Saturday, 12 October 2013 0 comments

Do relationships affect our goals?
How Relationships Affect Your Goals?


Everything in our lives can change when we are in a relationship, including our goals. What we want for ourselves and how we work towards achieving it is largely affected by our relationship and our partner. Here are some of the ways that our relationships affect our goals:

1. Take on their level of motivation. When we are in a relationship we often take on a lot of the same likes and dislikes as our partner, especially as we spend more and more time together. This includes levels of motivation. If our partner is highly motivated, it can rub off on us and push us to set goals beyond what we might normally do. On the flip side, if our partner is unmotivated it can bring us down and make us lazy and complacent.

2. Changes travel-based goals. Many of our goals have to do with travel, or moving to a new city for school, work or adventure. When we get into a couple these goals may shift priority for us. We might not be as interested in pursuing goals that would have us leave where our partner is, and we might put these goals on the backburner in order to stay close to each other.

3. Sense of competition. We can become motivated to set and achieve goals if we have a competitive streak, and want to outdo, or keep up with our partner. If they are getting awarded a bunch of scholarships it might push us to apply for some and study extra hard ourselves, so as not to be outdone by them. Our competitive nature can be a great driving force behind our motivation.

4. Set goals as a couple. When you’re single, all of your goals are probably centered around yourself. When you are part of a couple, you will likely start to set goals and make future plans as a couple. Maybe you’d like to see yourselves moving in together as part of your 5-year plan, or you start saving money together to take a trip together.

5. Blurred lines between whose goals are whose. The more time you spend together as a couple, the more common it is to start rubbing off on each other. You might take on some of their likes and dislikes, as well as some of their personality traits. We often have goals in mind that confuse what we want with what they might want. It’s common to have goals set that aren’t really something that you want or that you’d be working towards if you weren’t with your partner.


6. Affects types of goals. As a single person, your goals might be more socially focused and you might be interested in working towards things that will get your out and meeting new people. When you’re in a couple, your priorities can shift. You might become more interested in setting goals together or goals that are relationship based.
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